The Sherlock Holmes Kink Meme Archive
Our depravity knows no bounds
Penname: mothergoddamn [Contact]
Real name: mothergoddamn
Status: Member
Member Since: 04 Feb 2011
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Stories by mothergoddamn
24 HOURS by mothergoddamn Rated: Gen [ - ]
Summary: 24/Holmes Crossover
Categories: Ficlets Characters: Blackwood, Gladstone, John Watson, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Crack, Humour
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: 2009 Movie (RDJ)
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 09 Feb 2011 Updated: 09 Feb 2011


Albino Cave Dweller by mothergoddamn Rated: PORN [ - ]
Summary: WANT TO SEE YOU MAKE USE OF AS MANY OF THESE HORRIBLE EUPHEMISMS FOR PENIS AS YOU CAN IN ONE FIC.MAKE ME WINCE AND LAUGH AND CRY AND THEN DIE A LITTLE INSIDE. MULTIPLE MINI!FILLS ENCOURAGED, EVERYONE CAN PLAY. ULTRA BONUS POINTS FOR WORKING IN LESTRADE.
Categories: Ficlets Characters: Inspector Lestrade, John Watson, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Crack, Humour
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: Victorian Era (Non-Specific)
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 05 Feb 2011 Updated: 05 Feb 2011


Challenge #3 by mothergoddamn Rated: Gen [ - ]
Summary: For Challenge #3

The Japanese have an expression, "even monkeys fall from trees." It is a phrase used to comfort someone after they make an uncharacteristic mistake.

So, the theme is: mistakes, large or small and of any nature.
Categories: Ficlets Characters: None
Genre: Horror
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: Victorian Era (Non-Specific)
Challenges:
Series: Challenge #3
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 18 Feb 2011 Updated: 18 Feb 2011


Dark!Mothergoddamn by mothergoddamn Rated: Teen [ - ]
Summary: So, I'm trailing through this meme cringing at my drunken outbursts. Apparently I wrote a terrible RIP to Gary Coleman, put contacts in over other contacts, gave away my Kiefer DVD collection and offered to write het? I also woke up to find this fill attempt open in Microsoft Word. I have no idea what I was filling so if this is yours-enjoy.
Categories: Ficlets Characters: Meme Members, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Crack
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: Victorian Era (Non-Specific)
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 10 Feb 2011 Updated: 10 Feb 2011


Summary: Dark!Watson vs Chuck Norris.
Categories: Ficlets Characters: Dark!Watson
Genre: Crack, Humour
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: 2009 Movie (RDJ)
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 09 Feb 2011 Updated: 09 Feb 2011


Summary: Dark!Watson gets his hands on your tamagotchi
Categories: Ficlets Characters: Dark!Watson, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Crack, Humour
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: Victorian Era (Non-Specific)
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 10 Feb 2011 Updated: 10 Feb 2011


Duck Soup by mothergoddamn Rated: Gen [ - ]
Summary: i wish someone would write a story about either holmes or watson
suffering from a rather uncommon phobia.
my suggestions would be:
1) Anatidaephobia – fear of being watched by a duck
2) Anthophobia – fear of flowers
3) Chorophobia - fear of dancing

do whatever you like with it ^^
I dare you =)

(and I'll massage your feet if you write this!)
Categories: Ficlets Characters: Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Horror
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: 2009 Movie (RDJ)
Challenges:
Series: Duck soup
Chapters: 1 Completed: No Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 16 Feb 2011 Updated: 16 Feb 2011


Duck Soup 2 by mothergoddamn Rated: Gen [ - ]
Summary: Sequel to Duck Soup
Categories: Ficlets Characters: John Watson, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Horror
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: 2009 Movie (RDJ)
Challenges:
Series: Duck soup
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 16 Feb 2011 Updated: 16 Feb 2011


Summary: Holmes gets mocked by Scotland Yard and wibbles, in a manly way. Watson is all, FUCK YOU, BITCHES. TASTE MY CANE.

But verbally.

Then Watson takes him and ravishes Holmes like a duck on bread.
Categories: Fiction Characters: John Watson, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Humour
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: 2009 Movie (RDJ)
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 16 Feb 2011 Updated: 16 Feb 2011


Summary: Holmes comes to Irene's rescue
Categories: Fiction Characters: Irene Adler, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Drama , H/C
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: 2009 Movie (RDJ)
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 11 Feb 2011 Updated: 11 Feb 2011


Summary: Dark!Homophobic Watson tricks naive, curious Holmes into giving him a handjob.
Categories: Fiction Characters: Dark!Watson, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Angst, Dark
Pairing: None
Story Elements: DubCon, Handjob
Universe: Victorian Era (Non-Specific)
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 05 Feb 2011 Updated: 05 Feb 2011


Looking for Mary by mothergoddamn Rated: Teen [ - ]
Summary: Hard-boiled Hollywood Noir Holmes
Categories: Fiction Characters: Inspector Gregson, Inspector Lestrade, Irene Adler, James Moriarty, John Watson, Mary Watson nee Morstan, Mycroft Holmes, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: AU
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: Victorian Era (Non-Specific)
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 09 Feb 2011 Updated: 09 Feb 2011


Summary: Watson is over Holmes whoring it up with half of London. So he writes in one of his stories about how much of a cockslut Holmes is.
I don't even know. Just make it funny.
Categories: Ficlets Characters: John Watson, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Crack
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: Victorian Era (Non-Specific)
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 05 Feb 2011 Updated: 05 Feb 2011


SO I STOLE THIS by mothergoddamn Rated: Gen [ - ]
Summary: The Bulwer-Lytton Contest has people submit the worst opening sentence from the worst novels never written. Some of them are truly inspiring in their awfulness.

In that vein: write the worst opening sentence for the worst Holmes story never written.
Categories: Ficlets Characters: None
Genre: Crack
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: None
Challenges:
Series: It was a dark and stormy night
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 17 Feb 2011 Updated: 17 Feb 2011


The Bet by mothergoddamn Rated: PORN [ - ]
Summary: Dark!Watson seduces Holmes, but makes him think its the other way round.
Categories: Fiction Characters: Dark!Watson, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Dark, First Times, PWP
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: 2009 Movie (RDJ)
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 10 Feb 2011 Updated: 10 Feb 2011


The Breakfast Club by mothergoddamn Rated: Teen [ - ]
Summary: I am having a day. A bad day. And what I need is some Holmes/Watson h/c...no, that's such a lie. What I need is some Holmes/Watson c, with minimal h. Maybe Watson has a shitty day at his practice and Holmes has a shitty day solving crimes and they come home to Baker Street and...what? Have mindblowing sex? Play strip-Risk? Indulge in some primal scream therapy? I just don't know, guys, but I do know I need soooomething to tide me over until I can get home tonight and wipe away my woes by writing TA!Holmes.

I love you all, really and truly and enough to make this hellish day a little better,
Categories: Ficlets Characters: John Watson, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: H/C, Humour
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: None
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 10 Feb 2011 Updated: 10 Feb 2011


Summary: Holmes is annoying. Watson fucking loses it.
Categories: Ficlets Characters: John Watson, Sherlock Holmes
Genre: Humour
Pairing: None
Story Elements: None
Universe: 2009 Movie (RDJ)
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 1 Completed: Yes Word count: N/A
[Report This] Published: 05 Feb 2011 Updated: 05 Feb 2011